1. Stretch marks can show up even on stick people like me. My thighs look like one of those maps with longitude and latitudelines, done in delightful shades of white, cream, light brown, beige and even silver!
2. I need a cup of hot coffee to function. Be it the 3-in-1 in the pantry's vendo machine or a simple cafe latte at JJ or a Dark Cherry Mocha at Starbucks, I'm not a fully awake human being until I have caffeine in my system.
3. Wikipedia can make you forget about the remaining three or four hours of your boring shift. Just type any word and almost always, Wiki has an answer! Try your birthday too see if you share the same natal day (or even obituary) as a famous celeb royalty. The only famous one I found sharing my birthday was Diane Keaton, born January 5, 1946. Some great searches I discovered: Ferdinand Marcos, Holocaust, Autofellatio (the pics werre, uhm, surprising, hehehe!) and Abortion. Related: lyricwiki for that pesky LSS (last song syndrome).
4. Keep your enemies close, and your friends closer.
5. The fear of being inadequate. I gave my daughter a piece of stationery and after writing the customary "I love you Mommy" notes she has scattered all over our room, she showed me another note that read (sic): "Dad, I am weyting for you. Synd, your dutur..." Melodramatic as it may seem, I felt a stab at realizing my daughter, no matter how hard I try to give her everything and raise her independently, will naturally look for her father, or even a father figure.
6. Crow's feet. Those pesky premature signs of ageing. Those wonderful little reminders of how I abused my young body with too much sun, less sunblock, nicotine, booze and all-nighters studying or partying. Eeek! It's too damn early!!! Enter paranoid me and bought the whole line of Olay Total Effects products!
7. My days of being effortlessly skinny are numbered. It was a little-known but proven fact that the ladies in my family (at least my mom and two sisters) spend their early years wearing miniscule clothing, thanks to our fast metabolism. But once we hit the late-twenties and early thrities, it slows down considerably and more so as we age. So I guess I have to enjoy all those pizza, cakes, junkfood and frappes with extra cream while the weighing scale is still kind to me!
8. Bob Ong has a quote for everything, as evidenced by those forwarded text messages and quotes to me everyday. Sinabi ba talaga ni Bob Ong lahat yan? My favorite is: "Bakit ka magtitiis sa taong alam mong sakit lang ng ulo mo? Wag mong ikulong ang sarili mo sa hawlang ginto pero sira ang kandado. Sino bang may sabing hindi madaling makahanap ng kapalit? Kahit ibon marunong maghanap ng bagong pugad, tao pa kaya?"
9. Money doesn't grow on trees. The only things that grow on money are interest, finance charges, late fees, overlimit fees, transaction charges and other wonderful hidden penalties!
10. I value my family more now that we rarely get to spend time with or see each other. As we grew older and have our own families, I miss the days of all of us living under one roof, fighting over the last hotdog at breakfast or being chaufferred to school all together by our father in our beat-up old Corolla. But I also cherish the kind of mature camarderie we have now than the endless bickering and fist-fights we used to have (especially me and my Kuya!).
11. ebay.ph.com! Lots of cheap stuff, although one has to be careful of scammers and online assholes.12. The pleasure and importance of earning (and spending) my own money.
13. The world won't end if you don't find Mr. Right. Have fun with the Mr. Right-Nows in the meantime. Life's too short to stress out way too much about the future. Not all of us are meant to have fluffy white weddings and cozy baby showers.
14. Bagong jeepney scam (as related by Maru on the Alabagn-San Pedro route): Habang nagpupuno ang jeep sa pila o terminal, may mamang uupo sa likod ng driver at mangongolekta ng bayad. Fly si jeep, pagdating sa may Starmall (formerly Metropolis Star, chever lang) may-i-jump si Manong with all the pasahero's money, yung iba isandaan, wala pa sukli. Mega-demand na ngayon ang mga passsengers nasaan na ang sukli. Ang driver? Wala daw syang narinig at natanggap na nagbayad. Nung may nagsabi na inabot dun sa mamang nangolekta, nagalit si diver! Tatanga-tanga daw ang mga pasahero bakit inaabot sa iba ang bayad! Ang taray! Obviously magkasabwat sila. Moral of the story: iabot ang bayad pag bababa na or sakto lang ang iabot. Better yet, picture-an mo si manong or ang driver getting the money from you at papirmahin mo sya ng kasulatang bayad ka na!
15. Always ask for an official receipt. Every payday, I would get pissed at the tax deduction I see in my payslip (tanginang BIR lahat taxable!). It would be less disconcerting if knew my hard-earned money is going to the improvementof my country instead of into the pockets of another corrupt politician. It's annoying that even some business here in LB skip on issuing receipts so as not to remit taxes. My mom once berated a salesgirl at this infamous bakery when she ordered a chocolate cake and the girl said they only issue receipts upon customers' requests. That should not be the case, which is why stores have those BIR/TIN decals mandating them to give official receipts. My mom half-jokingly told her:" Pag tinoyo ako isumbong ko kayo sa BIR."
16. Procrastination is one nasty habit I ought to kick for good.
17. Cleanse, tone, moisturize and protect. Now if only my visible pores would disappear like, now na!
18. Kani salad. Love that mix of lettuce, cucumber, ripe mango, apples and crab sticks dressed in creamy mayo.
19. Its OK to be happy and contented where you are right now, no matter how mediocre or puzzling some people might think your actions or decisions are. No one can make you ahppy but yourself.
20. KUMON. Well worth the extra bit of expense. My kid reached her grade's reading level quickly, and is now happier and more confident reading her books and magazines. Now, she's the one who reads me stories before I go to sleep.
21. There's a mecca of cheap shoes in the basement of Metropolis Starmall. From Chucks to Vans knock-offs, authentic-looking Crocs and Havies, to colorful patent flats and shiny peep-toes, there are evn 100-peso "step-ins" for all your shoe fetishes.
22. What I learned in college (writing skills, grammar and vocabulary, etc.) do disintegrate with misuse and infrequent practice. What's future perfect tense again? People and Reader's Digest are not enough to sustain me. Someone plese lend me their extensive reading list for this year. I want books! I need books!
23. The beach is really my happy place. Laiya, Munting Buhangin, La Union, Galera, Guimaras... sigh. As long as the sand, surf and toilets are reasonably clean, I'm in. Next up: Bora and Bohol, and Anawangin Cove in Zambales!
24. I might not need religion, but darnit, I gotta have faith. I hope to have better and more personal conversations with God.
25. Don't take anything or anyone for granted. We all know (but often wish otherwise) that we can't bring back time, no matter what. You don't always need extravagant planned vacations or gimmicks. I try to make the most of early-morning muni-muni time, walks around Elbi at dusk, kilitian or random Q&A's with my kid about the facts of life, tambay time with friends and P... it's the little things that make the bigger things more memorable.
26. Maturity doesn't always go with ageing, it comes from experience. Therefore when a bad experinec keeps on repeating itslef due to your own stubborness and stupidity, have the maturity to walk the hell away. YOU DESERVE BETTER.
I know I do.
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